The Need For A Capitalized God

This response was posted to my web blog regarding my letter yesterday (April 25, 2005):


Anonymous said...
Friend, the universe is a cold, nasty chaos. God neither gives nor takes away. What you are going through is random and cruel. The strength you are finding to bear it is YOURS. YOU are your own power. I'd like to see you give yourself some credit. Good luck.

Dear Anonymous,

My heart dropped when I read your post. You live in a dark and hopeless world. Truly, my heart aches for you…not in a condescending way, but in a heartfelt way. I felt depressed after I read your post, not because I subscribe to your philosophy, rather I felt the sense of hopelessness you must feel day in and day out.

I want to take a second and review what you wrote to me.

“Friend, the universe is a cold, nasty chaos.”
“God neither gives nor takes away.”
“What you are going through is random and cruel.”
“The strength you are finding to bear, it is YOURS.”
“YOU are your own power.”
“I’d like to see you give yourself some credit.”
“Good luck.”


1) The universe is the antithesis of chaos. Look around at what you Creator has done. For example, the human body is amazing and orderly…each intricate part working in tandem with the next. Anonymous, your next breath is a part of a symphony that can only be led by an orchestration of the mighty Conductor. It’s only by the grace of God that you take this breath…now. Talk about orderly, what if God allowed the Sun to move 10 miles closer or further from the Earth. The Creator of the Heavens and the Earth knew exactly where Anonymous needed to live in order not to be fried or frozen. God defines order. People define chaos. It’s easy to look at the chaos and assume that God is behind it. Look deeper…and you’ll find warmth and order in our universe.

2) The Lord both gives and takes away. The Lord has given me peace. The Lord has taken away my fear. Did God allow this or put this aneurysm in my head…or neither? I don’t know. I don’t claim to fully understand the Lord’s ways. If I could fully conceive my God, He would not be much of a God at all. It is the fact that He is not fully known that embodies His mystery. I’m alright with that.

3) What I am going through is a blessing. This one may be hard for you to understand. I believe God is refining my love for Him. Each day I live with this aneurysm is a stroll on a cool spring day with my Father. I feel an intimacy with Him that is indescribable. Quite simply, this is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Reread that sentence. I carefully thought out the words that I just wrote. My joy is not conjured up or contrived. This is why I wrote the original letter “An Open Letter to a Non-Christ Follower.” It was my attempt to let you see the impossible…joy in the midst of trial. Your joy is being stolen from satan. There is a disconnect here because it is impossible for your pain and burden to be lifted by the god you serve.

4) Anonymous, please reread my blog. How long can a guy pull himself up by his own bootstraps? It is only because the God who knows my inner being is walking with me that I am able to deal with this blood-filled golf ball in my brain. I know me. If I was facing this on my own I would be feeling worry, pain, frustration, hopelessness and complete depression.

5) I’ve walked with the power you have. I failed….miserably. It was only when I cried out in utter desperation, did I have a power that can only be given from Heaven. I am not wired up to carry this burden on my own…neither are you. I am often asked how I’m doing. It’s my friends who have not fully submitted their lives to the Lord that say, “No way.” Or, “I don’t know how you’re holding up.” This response, while I do not stand in judgment of my friends, is expected because of their life’s experiences. It’s difficult to walk this road without my Daddy walking it with me.

6) Anonymous, I prayed (with tears running down my face) the day that I saw this monstrosity in my head, “God, please allow me to walk through whatever I’m about to face with peace, humility and the unwavering desire to give You the credit for what comes out of this. God, let me resist the temptation to approach this with fear or trepidation, rather let me approach this rocky road with a wild abandon for your grace and faithfulness.” He has answered my prayer.

7) Luck is for Vegas, horseshoes and the lottery. Faith, prayer and complete humility before my Maker are what I need most right now.

First of all, thanks for taking the time to respond to this post. However, I have to say this was one of the hardest things I have ever read. Not because you have disagreed with my writings, but because I have never read something that embodies the word ‘hopelessness’ before.

I noticed that you capitalized “God.” I’m not sure you would have done this if it had not been the first word in the sentence. From your statements, I would presume you do not serve a “capitalized God.” Taken straight from your statements, your god is unable to: 1) bring warmth 2) bring blessing 3) bring comfort 4) bring strength 5) bring power 6) bring sovereignty or 7) bring answers to your prayers. You are in desperate need for a capitalized God.

Anonymous, I appreciate your words. I don’t judge you in any way, but pray that you would come to know the God who orders the universe, and who has given more to me than I could have ever asked or imagined and who has led me down a rocky road with gentleness and complete faithfulness. He’s good. You’d really like Him if you got to know Him. I challenge you to capitalize your god. I pray that as you take your next breath, you would be unable to take in for granted, but instead give credit to Him who gave it to you.